"We Were Girls Once": Navigating Womanhood, Politics, and Trauma
"We Were Girls Once" by Aiwanose Odafen is a contemporary continuation of an intergenerational friendship from the book "Tomorrow I Become a Woman". From the grandmothers to their mothers and now down to the daughters: Ego, Eriife and Zina - we follow these women on their journies to navigate the different elements of their womanhood. With the backdrop of a politically tumultuous Nigeria, their own rocky romantic lives, the resurgence of old traumas and the unfortunate occurrence of new ones we see how their relationships adapt, evolve and disintegrate.
Aiwanose displays different types of womanhood from the main characters and their family members. Aiwanose's feminist stance is made clear in the book and is accentuated by the friends, mothers and grandmothers that enable patriarchal violence through the silencing of victims. Despite the differences in values between the women, the three women have a strong bond and try to balance their ideals with their love and support for one another whilst also dealing with their families. Although there was frustration with the women that enabled patriarchal harm, they were written in a way that helped the reader understand that they believed they had good intentions - it makes us confront ourselves and the way in which we support and address victims.
Trauma is a predominant theme in this book, as is common with books from Nigerian writers, and even Black writers as a whole. We see the trauma from the elder generation of women impact our main characters and we witness the main characters deal with sexual trauma, childhood trauma and various patriarchal traumas. When we interviewed Aiwanose, she even stated that writing certain parts of the book was traumatic for her!
Our Nigerian book clubbers found this book relatable as it displayed many predominant historical and political events whilst also educating those that aren’t necessarily connected to the heritage. It also highlighted the isolation of the immigrant experience as Ego was a graduate from Oxford university and an upcoming lawyer that struggled in the social and dating sphere in the UK.
Aiwanose mentioned her influences from Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie and Chinua Achebe which is evident in the story's resemblance to Adichie's novel "Americanah". Aiwanose also recommended "Songs of Solomon" by Toni Morrison and "Vanishing Half" by Brit Bennett as books that help her out of reading slumps!
As a book club that shares our adventures on social media, we appreciated the incorporation of Ego's tweets in the book. It added another layer of relatability!
Have a read of this book if you are looking for something contemporary that highlights how the political landscape affects the personal for generations!
Comments